It’s All These Bloomin’ Gorei!

It’s all these bloomin’ gorei!

The Yankees and the Brits

They colonised the Muslim world

And made us look like twits!

They used us for their World Wars

They stripped our lands of riches

They left us fighting like hyenas

Then watched us fight, in stitches

But they did give us their passports

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Never Again, They Said

Never again, will it happen, they said

Never again, will the Nazis purge, they said

Never again, will the children of Israel grieve, they said

Never again will we sit by

While they use their poisoned words, they said

While they call them vermin, rats and traitors, they said

While they spread their hate and theories, they said

About their faith and about their intentions, they said

While they say the Jews are treacherous, they said

While they prepare the ground for the gassings and rapes

While their poison works through the public’s veins, they said

While their headlines and stories purvey the hate, they said

While their propaganda blinds the masses, they said

Never again will such hatred breed, they said

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The Rise of Trump and Baghdadi

A New Yorker called Donald Trump
With Latinos and Muslims, he had the hump!
For him all the Latinos were a bunch of druggies
And Muslims were a national security worry.

He’d flick his quiff and pick and sniff
While screaming firebrand speeches
The Muslims angered him so much
He’d go all pink like peaches!

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Dear…

Dear Young Men of Baghdadi’s fiefdom,
Is Allah pleased?
When you fire upon civilians
When you shoot cowering women in the temple
Is Allah pleased?
When you blow up your own bodies
And your limbs lie upon the limbs of a young child
Is Allah with you?
When you kidnap young women
And use and abuse them for your own lusts
Does Allah approve of you?
When you deal in oil and drugs,
When you buy your stuff from gangsters and from thugs

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Dear Purveyors of Western Freedom,
When you lay waste to Arab cities,
Is this for freedom and equality?
When you ignore millions of dissenters
Is this for freedom and equality?
When you sell and manufacture chemical bombs,
Is this for freedom and equality?
When you create heaven in your lands
But sow discord and conjure hell elsewhere
Is this for freedom and equality?
When you oscillate between who is your ally and who is your terrorist
Is this for the sake of freedom and equality?

I’m A Muslim Man In Britain

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I’m an alien, I’m a legal alien. Sting            

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This is what I think it means to be a British Muslim today, who was born and bred in England but hailed from immigrant parents. To have an eclectic medley of voices swirling around in your brain. Living and constantly shifting between different worlds, religions, languages, cultures, traditions and voices, all competing for some kind of hold on your identity, on your spirit, your will. All this baggage, mixed-loyalties, competing face masks and fashions stuffed into a short-lived life, which, for many of us, typically consists of home, school, mosque and holidays to Pakistan and the holy lands or whichever country you hail from.

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The Old Man And His Children

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The greatest trick the devil plays on man is to make him believe he is free.

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Far away in the hills, there lived this big, proud old man, with his wife and many young children. This man was larger than life, extremely generous and caring to his dependants, but at times he could be cruel and tyrannical. Consequently his children would flee when rage filled him and his wife would weep when anger swelled in his eyes. This old man led his family the way he saw fit, and for many a year lived like a king of his own little world.

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The Speech

By Novid Shaid, 2011

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The chairman stood upon the podium, grinning at the seated gentlemen, who sat around their tables which were arranged in their ceremonial shape, and began:

“My dear colleagues and friends! I would like to welcome you to this historic, inaugural Greedlibb conference, which I am confident will develop through the future at great progress. I as the chairman am utterly honoured to be addressing you in this opening speech, before we split into our respective groups for the strategic planning sessions.
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